March 4, 2016

BY: James Thomas Owens

TO: Me:

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. That was me 

But you loved me anyway.   

       

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. I accused you.

But you did good, and loved me anyway

Remember when  you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.

Always keep an eye, don't let them hurt you.

The good you do today will probably be  forgotten tomorrow.

Do good anyway, I will never forget.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.

Be honest and frank anyway. Transparency is a gift!

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.

Think big anyway. That's just who you are.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.

Fight for a few underdogs anyway. You fought like hell, I will never forget.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. I destroyed it

You built  anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. I attacked you.

You helped anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.

You gave me the best of your world, I'm sorry I did that to you

But give the world the best you have anyway. 

You are the best

I heard the plan of your heart beneath my ear

You call yourself a fighter but run away from the battle

Are you listening?

Are you wondering where we will end up?

 You never could read the compass of my heart

I am pulled to the corners of the earth and am spread about by your wind

Im scared so scared....where is my army?

When I hear I love you, My ears are drowned out by the sound of your feet fleeing to the South

I come from your North 

when you say you love me....I only hear your regret

When you say you love me I only hear your blame

Where have you been my whole life? 

So tired of all this strife...

I bring so little to your life, so be free

I will take your bullet and set the snare loose
 your feet are free to run

 Whispers...

Whispers that scratch and claw their way over your shoulder and into your ear
you can be looking at yourself in the mirror or be standing in the grocery store checkout line, but it's when you least expect it that's when the whispers slither 
their way in

It's the whispers that come with pictures, feelings, memories and painful disappointment. The lying whispers that crawl into your mind with idea's of how to self inflict more pain, disappointment, and self loathing.

I hear the music of hypnotic lies and they are deafening

 If you begin to believe what you are hearing even for the briefest moment the whispers become a voice that shouts all your failures and doubts.

When the whispers roll in I can chose to reach for your sweet melody that quiets the voices and sings sweet numbing embellishments to my soul

your size so insignificant but the space you consume so vast

It's a comforting warmth as it swims down through the corridors of my body
eye's feeling heavy and I slip down into the space of nothingness and fade away from it all

Sweet dreams...

Dreaming if only for a moment where a symphony of light, truth and a clarity produces a feeling of lasting love

The sun is my alarm clock with its heat beckoning me to join the day of smiles, laughter and the veil of roll play 

I am aware of the choices, aware of what is music and what is just an illusion of song

 Whispers are the guards of confusion, here to protect their investment of lies   

I know a sprinkle of despair is always standing in the shadows willing to participate if given the chance

I choose instead to close my eyes and dream...

Do you ever hear the whispers?

Moon Lit Water Shimmering Off the Bridge of Beauty

I close my eyes and see black boots tracking across the bridge of gold
The adventurous come to walk acrossed it, the lost come to end it with one swift leap from a man made tower of lies and desperation.

It's beauty is as massive as the emotions that lead the droves across its belly. One behind the other, bumper touching bumper, horns blowing, air thick with gasoline, helicopters whizzing about, sail boat's carelessly floating by.

My heels hurt and the blisters are a reminder of my poor choice of foot wear today.

Looking up I see another suicide sign in a thicket of cameras that search the ropes of the bridge. I wonder what the person is like working behind the lens of that camera looking out for the brave and the hopeless sky diver. It's that thought of the lost one that stands there on the edge who is willing and able to end it all that touches my soul.
I am cold, it sends shivers down my back with thoughts of standing on the edge with them while the wind beats across my chest.

Cold wind rips past me as fast as the pictures snapped by tourists standing near by. People from every nation hoping to capture their moment that will go home with them along with their hope of returning.

Scarves, gloves, long wool coats, row houses, smell of crab & fish,
 fresh baked bread that hovers in the air enticing hunger yes!
Shops of every sort, water front and seals that come to visit,
street vendors, professional beggars, music so loud and crowds even bigger.

Wines poured, glasses filled, and the fragrance of grapes, soil and earth at every stop.
Lets hop along the train ride of laughter, beauty and romance and lose ourselves, even for a brief moment of what if

Palace hotel fit for a king & queen, walks for miles, hot baths, rose covered beds, doormen with whistles, rental cars, trolley rides, Polk St. three story, a city to discover on every corner,
sidewalk performers, dinner with friends, boat rides, prison visits, dinner under the water,

memories in a light house, exploring old military forts, photographers dream, remembering childhood    family that lie beneath the oak, Baudoin bread bowls filled with clam chowder, butter, an extra large coke, hot coffee, carousel ponies on the wind chilled pier, hands held, lips kissed, memories made

Another day comes, planes depart and home awaits our arrival, goodbye San Francisco until next time...

Snow Fall

It falls so freely, covering branches, leaves, tops of cars and everything breathing scatters

You leave me cold without color and when I open my eyes what once had color is now black and white but yet still not void of beauty

You have made things fragile and if stepped upon what's left will be blackened from the memory of where I've walked

Still looking up, I wait 

A clear chilled breeze blows past my ear and I feel you coming, free falling

As you hit the tops of my shoulders I am filled with your pain 

A pain that I volunteer myself to take so the memory of its beauty and wonder is never forgotten  

I am cold, wet, shivering with fatigue 

 The darkness found me and has set in, all light has gone

Its time for me to step into warmth, and a blanket of rest...

Good Night 

Discarded love...

Its all You've Ever Wanted and You have Been Given More then Most 

They turned Their backs on you and They Stare into the Mirror of Selfishness so
they Cannot See You. 
They See Only their Failure, in Themselves Not you

Do You See Me?

Have You Ever Seen Me?

I'm the Light over your Shoulder 
the Voice in Your Head
the Ache in Your Heart

They Are the Pain in Your Chest 
the Tickle in Your Throat that Can't be Scratched
the Tooth Ache that was Never Taken Care of

I am the Tear down Your Cheek
the Dreams that you Push away as You Sleep

They are the Dream, Joy, and Laughter Thieves 
The Pain in your Joints, the Bleeding Fingers and Sore Feet

I am the Giver, Lover, Encourager, Friend and Hope

They are the Lie, Disappointment and the Box You Live in

I am the Freedom and Imagination of Possibility 

I have been Thrown Away, Given Up on, While You Still Hold Out Hope For Their Love that Will Never Come

You Are Filled with Light, Love Compassion and Were Born to BE A Warrior 
You are A Wonder, a Gift and A Leader 
You are Born to Be and will Be Again...

Yesterday, Today, & Tomorrow For Eternity

War Of My Life (Acoustic) - John Mayer